The Diary Of An Inspired Mum


The Blue Collar MillionairesI have had a weekend off this weekend, and I was sorting out my desk on Saturday morning and came across an old journal from 3 nearly four years ago … I cannot share it with you in full detail as a lot of it is personal …and probably pretty boring too, but some of the entries show where I was at, and how I was feeling…

These may help you relate to where I was then and how I got here.

Wednesday

Playgroup, Oh deep joy.

Friday

Looking forward to seeing the girls tonight… oh bliss, an oasis amidst all these nappies, and endless thomas the tank…

Saturday

Well the only good thing I can say about last night is it left me with a headache! excellent news will have to nurture it !

Wednesday

Bloody playgroup … again! What is wrong with me? Why can’t I just be like these other Mooning Mummies and be satisfied with all this? Even if we had the money from H’s Job so we could afford me to do this …   I would be so friggin Bored!

Jacob filled his nappy I didn’t realise till all the other mums noses curled! Snotty cows!

Friday

They have been on the phone again… I hate them I have less than 16 weeks of trouble free motherhood and they want a decision NOW! I hate Personnel… I know they have a job to do and I am just a number… But I am so confused… I know we need the money, I know I should just find child care… But I am the best person to look after them… I do not like the way J has been brought up so far I need to get involved… Fuck this is impossible…

Saturday

Why can’t a cuddle just be a bloody cuddle… I am not some sort of device I have feelings, I need caring for I want to be cherished not bounced like a bloody ball!  WTF is wrong with me … I am turning into My Mum…

Sunday

Reuben ill today, I am so glad I am home, I know it is sunday, but just being here to hold him as the doctor looks him over … this is my JOB! This is where I need to be …

Monday

They have been on the phone again. I think they know, they must be able to sense that I do not want to go back… but what can I do instead… I cannot be the only Mum who feels like this… I wonder if I could start something for other Mums… Aghhh no… think play group!

Tuesday

Oh bliss Thank God For Grandmothers … right night out with the girls and have a laugh, bit of an inbetweeny… but it is a posh awards do that I have been invited back to… #misstheglitz

Wednesday

Oh no, Bloody Playgroup again … Good to talk to ‘A’  last night… she felt exactly the same and would love to quit, but just cannot afford it… how do you get the balance right… I wonder If I could start some thing from home? ( Not bloody Avon again… all those damned bags of powder and paint!) It has to pay, and it has to be something I can run around the boys.

Though after todays embarrassment I would happily send them back where they came from #widdle&puke

Thursday

This may just work. Found some web sites with business ideas on… all seems very bloke-ish…to much about silly cars… How do you get a buggy in a 911? There has to be some thing for Mums out there… if there isn’t could I start something?

Friday

Not very Inspired today… I wish I had a friend some where I could go and someone would just kick my arse!

And if Jacob does that thing with the lego again I will JUST GO BACK TO WORK!

Saturday 

Ugggh

Monday

Shit I lost It today  told the guy from the personnel office to do one … H going bald! how we going to live? We need a car… FFS grow up and be the man of the house.

Tuesday

Blimey cold hard reality creeps in on the dawn … could not sleep… Not from worry …  But the excitement…

I am free… I can do what I want … just got to work out how to pay for it now….

 

Wednesday

Playgroup again! Agggggh! Actually er today I made contact with a girl there, she has two girls, and a boy, at big school ( I even sound like them now!) she is looking at something on The Net… I agreed to look but warned her I am not selling anything be it, make-up, tupperware, sex aids or washing powder… she just laughed!

Reuben puked over her lovely Laura Ashley buggy cover… Got to love his taste!

Thursday ( 5 months later )

The Blue Collar MillionairesOh Diary sorry to be away for so long …

  1.  Book doing well … out for second proof reading
  2.  My marketing training is well under way.
  3.  Organisation vastly improved  ( Look bullet points in You, Dear Diary!)
  4. Website now live InspiredMum.co.uk … flash hu 😉
  5. Nigel says he is nominating me for an award! FFS I never get awards

 

 

 

 

 

post script

Obviously this is a very short exert from my diary over a 12 month period in the run up to the end, and finishing of, my maternity leave. I was in an awful place of being torn between the need for cash, fulfilment and motherhood…

Many people have said I cannot have my cake and eat it too…

But why not? Why shouldn’t I …

I worked out  that if I was feeling frustrated, and despising myself, for my lack of maternal instincts, or my inability to do the right thing by my family,

that maybe  a whole host of other Mums where feeling exactly the same …

So I established Inspired Mum as my call to action or meeting place for other mums

and

I joined an internet marketing training academy to learn how to get my message out and how to make a living from the work we do…

Have I made it? Well I am on my way.

Are the boys better off for having me at home? I think so, but sometimes I wish I was back at work dealing with grown up children instead of these two monsters!

Was it worth it? Are you kidding me… of course it was … speak soon

 

Take Care

 

Anna Blue Collar Millionaires

 

About The Author

Anna Davidson Thawe, is first and foremost a Mum to Jacob and Reuben,

She is a published author, and a very successful Founding Member Of The DIgital EXperts Academy.

After nearly 15 Years In the corporate world of pharmaceutical sales she has become one of the countries leading Mumpreneurs. She specialises in social media marketing and social media management.

Anna coaches a limited number of people a month on a personal level,

Learn More

 


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